Now and Then

I guess most people will be posting about the new year coming. :)

Year 2011. Alhamdulillah, I graduated from Sydney Uni. Travelled to a lot of places. Things move slowly, but alhamdulillah, I managed to get scholarship(s) to do my Masters degree. A year that I managed to experience working environment (although not for long, :p). A year that him and I are able to plan on taking a big step in our relationship. So Alhamdulillah for all that. :) Haa, and you know, a year where my sis started to wear hijab permanently, insyaAllah.

But I am still welcoming 2012. I will start pursuing my Masters degree. Will start saving money drastically for our ehem*engagement*ehem. And I want to get slimmer if possible!!! :(

Just hoping to be a better muslimah, a better student, a better person and a better daughter. I am not perfect, but I am hoping to make people around me happier each days. Arguments and fights and misunderstandings happen, so I truly apologize for any mistakes or misdoings. And dear Allah, Kau ampunkanlah dosa-dosaku, jauhilah aku dari kejahatan manusia, bencana dan gangguan syaitan, berkatilah perjalanan hidupku dan tunjukkanlah hidayahMu. Ameen.

I have this issue in mind. Ade seorang la hamba Allah ni, dia kate lebih baik bace tahlil sorang-sorang daripada beramai-ramai, sebab kalau semua orang bace yassin, siapa yang nak amik pahala mendengar. Pada pendapat saya la kan, mustahil kita tak mendengar bacaan kita sendiri setiap kali membaca. kecuali orang yang da ditarik nikmat mendengarnya la kan. betul tak? Pendapat saya boleh je bace beramai2, still dapat pahala. pahala membaca dapat, pahala mendengar pon dapat. cuma tak silap saya adabnya kena baca serentak la, tak leh tunggang langgang. ade orang mengambil mudah ayat ni. pahala mendengar da sama dengan membaca al-Quran, tak payah la nak baca. tapi kalau kita membaca, dua-dua pahala pon dapat kan? Lagipun mungkin ayat tu untuk orang yang contohnya, bisu? tak dapat membaca, so dapat la pahala mendengar. ataupun yang pekak? tak dapat pahala mendengar, dapat pahala membaca. Ini cuma pendapat saya je la. Cuma saya rasakan kalau nak buat ibadah tu, mungkin buat je la, nawaitunye kerana Allah. Pahala tu kan belakang cerita, sebab bukan kita decide berapa banyak pahala kita dapat, tetapi Dia yang menentukan. Islam itu tidak menyusahkan. :)

Okay, with this, I will end my post with HAPPY NEW YEAR! :))))

What do you want from me?

It was uncontrollable. I just dont know what do you want from me? You said to me like 10000 times how you prefer USM over UITM scholarship. Okay, I'll follow your words. And the head of cluster decided for me to choose UM to pursue my Masters, then okay. True, she replied my email quite late, and she had a lot of work to do so she will be busy for these two weeks, understandable. I totally understand her situation. Then what is the problem? Why are you asking me to choose UITM now? Why are you asking me what if she quits her job? She's a lecturer, a professor lagi tu, why would she just quits when she gives me a lot of proposal examples plus one of her student thesis for me to do my proposal? Why would you say you dont want me to be too dependent on her? I am not too dependent on her. It's natural to finalize my proposal with her. I did the proposal myself. I dont understand. What exactly do you want from me? It's not like I can apply for research degree with everyone, and just reject after they have discussed their projects with me. That's not the way. I know it's getting late, and the progress is slow, but it's getting there. BE PATIENT. I dont understand how the world works 100 years ago, but it sure is not the same now. Maybe I overreacted a bit, but the truth is, I still dont know what do you want from me. Maybe you hate my existence? I'm tired, seriously.

Warm wishes

Facebook is full with surprises. Truly happy for my schoolmate who is married and getting married. I guess, it is time for our era huh? :) Been invited by lots of samurian, but had to turn them down mostly due to transport problem, and the time restriction (betui ka ni?). But wishes all of you the best in your relationship. The recent ones are Kamal Iqraam and Muhd Haidar, my classmates back in Sri Kelana. Kecik-kecik dulu mentah main bagai nak rak, da kawin da rupanye. Hehehehe. Tahniah korang! :) Ape perasaanye ek apabila dah bergelar seorang suami/isteri? Again, congrats!