Salam suci

Been busy these few days. Well, eid mubarak is coming soon, and kakak is going back to Surabaya to celebrate eid mubarak with her family :) , so I've been cleaning the living hall, making kuih raya (and still making them!), going for groceries shopping, hunting food for break-fast, and well lots of stuff. I might just do this while I still have time! SO::::::::::

Salam Aidifiltri kepada semua. Minta maaf dari hujung rambut hingga ke hujung kaki di atas kesilapan dan kesalahan, terlanjur kata, terlajak perbuatan yang menyinggung perasaan atau segala benda negatif la. Di bulan yang mulia dan di hari yang mulia, marilah kita sama2 bergembira bersama keluarga dan orang yang tercinta. :) Jangan gaduh-gaduh, jangan masam muka (peringatan untuk diri sendiri jugak). Takut mungkin tak berkesempatan untuk menikmati lagi, kalau umur tak panjang kan. Mintak2lah dipanjangkan Ya Allah.

SELAMAT HARI RAYA AIDILFITRI.

and of course,

SELAMAT MENYAMBUT HARI KEMERDEKAAN MALAYSIA.

:))))))

R.A.Y.A

Baju raya                    CHECK
Rantai raya                  CHECK
Kasut raya                   CHECK
Tudung raya                 CHECK
Beg raya                      CHECK
Kuih raya                    IN PROGRESS

Hari raya????
Cant hide the excitement. :) Counting days. What about you?

The sunshine is here

It took 2 days for me to cool off. Hehehehe. So I've been reading my own posts, and realize how gloomy they are recently. So just want to post this entry to end this misery (misery by moffats sedang berkumandang yea rakan2 :P). Raya da nak dekat (erk ade la 2 minggu lagi) da ni. Excited tak? RAYA mostly reminded me of my kampung, SAUK at kuala kangsar. The best part is the Subuh prayer di pagi raya.

Aku masih tertidur lena. Kedengaran abah mengejutkan anak-anaknya untuk solat subuh. Giliran aku pula untuk dikejutkan, liat sedikit pada awalnya, tetapi aku bangun juga menuju terus ke tandas untuk mengambil air wuduk. Beratur juga orang yang mahu menggunakan tandas, sepupu, ibu saudara dan bapa saudara. Selepas mengambil wuduk, aku mengejutkan pula adik-adik perempuan aku. Kelihatan Atuk telah pun bersiap-sedia. Aku keluar ke beranda, memang selalunya kami solat berjemaah di situ.  Jelas kedengaran bunyi cengkerik. Terasa kedinginan angin. Suasana yang tenang sekali. Aku pantas memakai telekungku kerana ku lihat ramai orang telah bersedia. Azan berkumandang. Terus kami bingkas bangun untuk solat berimamkan Atuk. Setelah selesai memberi salam dan berdoa, kami terus bertakbir. Hanya Allah tahu betapa syahdunya sewaktu itu. Kami bermaaf-maafan antara satu sama lain. Beratur adik-beradik mahu memohon ampun dengan kedua ibu bapa. Kemudian memohon ampun dengan Atuk dan Opah. Kemudian dengan saudara mara yang lain. Mula kedengaran kokokan ayam. Siang makin hampir untuk menyapa manusia. Aku bergegas mengambil tuala, tak sanggup aku untuk berebut tandas nanti. Aku antara yang pertama mandi, dan juga antara yang pertama memperagakan baju raya. 

It was such a sweet memory, still lingers freshly in my mind each time Raya comes. This exact feeling wont come twice, without Atuk and Opah, and with all of us growing up, the feeling definitely wont be the same. Al-Fatihah to Atuk and Opah, even though I'm not there when I'm supposed to, my doas are always with you. Ameen.

Sorry???

There's always caste in this world. Mostly between the rich and the poor. But there is also between the parents and the children. Some of you maybe I'm just rebelling, or making a revolution or whatever. Maybe I'm too narrow-minded or open-minded. But this has been in my mind for long.

Saling memohon maaf antara satu sama lain, memang digalakkan dalam Islam bukan? Tetapi, terdapat hukum ke yang mengatakan hanya anak-anak sahaja yang perlu meminta maaf kepada kedua ibu-bapanya? atau hanya orang muda sahaja yang perlu meminta maaf kepada orang yang lebih tua? Bagi saya, asalkan da buat salah, memang kena minta maaf, tak kisah la kalau anda seorang bapa, seorang ibu, seorang guru atau seorang perdana menteri pon.

Some thinks that as long as a parent apologizes, you should have to forgive them, but if a child apologizes, her/his parent has the right to accept the apology or not. Ridiculous right? But this has been going on in the community for awhile now. I am not satisfied with this kind of thinking. It's ridiculous to agree that older people can do whatever they want to younger people just because, they're older?

Yes, I've been told that. That I am being ridiculous for not accepting ****'s apology. Saying that I should be grateful **** is apologizing to me, and  should not ask for more. That he didn't have to apologize, but he did it for me?? But I dont think an apology can solve the case right now, especially when he simply apologize without knowing the real reason behind this. He thinks I was offended by his advice, I am cool with advices, as long as they are given by people who have the rights to do that. In this case, he doesn't have the right to say so. Because he is very arrogant, always criticising other people's work, laughing at others' incompetency, mocking others. And he has the right to say I'm arrogant? Me? Me? Me? Memang tengah panas. Yes, I admit I cannot get this over with, my hands are still trembling with anger. Ramadhan, and oh dear Allah, please help me, I don't want to be like this. Sucikanlah hatiku, tenangkanlah hatiku, agar dapat aku melakukan ibadat dengan khusyuk, agar dapat ku menikmati keindahan bulan Ramadhan. Ameen.

Saya minta maaf kalau ada yang tersinggung dengan post saya ni. Saya bukan nak menyakiti mana-mana pihak, sekadar luahan hati dan perasaan saya.

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger

I guess my patience is wearing thin. I'm already worn out. I am very sad, sad enough to think that I dont care anymore about my existence.

I have been thinking a lot about this. Maybe everyone thinks the same. But I wonder, if there is anyone who will be crying over my death? Is my life significant enough for others to realize that I am here, or is my life better gone wasted because of how insignificant I am?

I DONT THINK YOU GUYS CAN UNDERSTAND WHAT IM TRYING TO SAY. BECAUSE I DONT.

Someone says to me that I am a very takbur person. I dont mind that. But I dont take that advice from a very takbur person. It's like when a murderer telling others not to kill because it's sinful. It is so ironic right? I HATE IRONY. But like my mom said, be strong, this is just one of the small challenges that Allah has set up for me. I must accept and be stronger. I'll try to take this positively.

But for tonight, please let me cry as much as I want. Because when tomorrow comes, I'll not cry anymore, and try to stand against the harsh wind bravely, fighting for my own fight, for my own life, and to be able to see at least a glimpse of happiness.

sumimasen??

Huuuuuuuu, AirAsia is now flying to Osaka!!! I've been wanting to go there! Why Osaka? Because it's famous for its takoyaki, which is undeniably appetizing! :D And, the flight is around RM600 return! ONLYYY!! like seriously. Huhuhuhu. Nak pegi. nak pegi. nak pegi. agak2nya kalau cakap 40 kali termakbul tak? :P

One of my wish list  and among the first - to travel to Japan. I love the food, i love the culture, and i love the language. :) My heart and my soul. Cewahh.

Putting Japan aside, people always told me that they are amazed because I am fearless. Well, I love horror and thriller movies, they are one of the things that excite me. But, one big thing that they are mistaken is that, i am fearless towards anything. That is so wrong!! Sometimes when I am all alone in the dark, I do feel scared, a lot of things run through my mind. Like what if suddenly zombies come attacking me, or if there's a little ghost scaring me, if there's something sleeping next to me. BUT what is important is not becoming fearless, but overcoming my fear. :) For example, when I'm thinking what will happen to me if zombies suddenly came attacking me, I'll think of ways to escape or fight the zombie. If suddenly a ghost appears in front of me, I'll recite the Quran, and calmly fight the ghost. And that actually makes me stronger. I've trained myself like this since I was small. I've put myself in such position a lot of times, especially before I went to sleep.


FEAR SHOULD MAKE YOU STRONGER, NOT WEAKER.


Well, one thing for sure, I've never position myself in driving a car, I couldnt. :( I hope I have the strength someday. I guess, no one is perfect. Alasan kan? Whateva laaah! :P

frustrated

Da plan dari minggu lepas da. Nak kuar cari shawl and baju melayu sama2. Even nak berbuka puasa sama2. Very excited. Counting down the days left. Tiba2 cancel. Down. Down. Sedih. Down. Speechless. Down. :(

 Yes, this is how i feel right now. Sad. Frustrated. Disappointed. Angry. Lost hope. At times like this, I always wonder, why do I even fell in love?

of new bag!! :D

Yay baru dapat beg tadi!! Thanks to CalaMan! :) Ngehehehe, gambar tak nak update because tak surprise la beg raya nanti. kan3? :) Esok mahu bershopping kat masjid jamek with cik abang. :))))))) 

Ok saje je bosan tak tau nak watpe. hehehehe. :P

The wonder of Kota Kinabalu

I feel guilty because I remember I made a promise last week, although it's kinda late tonight, I'll give my all to share about my trip to kota kinabalu. NOW IN CINEMA. lol.

Day 1

We departed from lcct early in the morning around 7am, and arrived in KK at about 10am. Abah rented a Myvi Waja, and we went straight to the hotel to check in. Well, I must admit the location is a bit off but good enough for me (Abah didnt like it). The hotel's name is 1City Hotel, and it wasnt as bad as it looks. Maybe because of the location (near Segama complex), it looks cheap and messy and stuff, but it is actually a nice hotel. We booked a family room for RM148 nett, and the room is superbly spacious (one single and one queen bed), interior design is extraordinary, the bathroom is super clean and nice ( Ida loveeee it! :P). And it is within walking distance to KFC and Burger King. Then after we checked in, we went to Kundasang. On our way, there was this accident, and we could see the dead bodies in the lorry. Scary! :( We had lunch at this one gerai, which is very gross unpleasant, so many lalatttt!!! Nasib baik tak food poisoning! Ijah and family also went to KK, and we met at the gerai. After that, we went to Kinabalu Park, it was foggy, and drizzling. The weather is nice, not that cold and not that hot, but because it was drizzling, we just captured some pics and went to the place where ijah stayed. Nice one!! :) sempat pekena maggi sayur, itu pon da macam hepi semacam. Hehehehe. We went back to KK, and had our dinner at this one expensive restaurant. I think the food was okay but not as worthy as the price claimed to be.

Day 2

It was raining. :( We planned to go snorkelling but sadly, there's nothing that we can do. It was inevitable. So we went to Muzium Sabah, mak didnt want to go out sebab hujan kan. Ida pon cam pemalas je. Tapi abah like so excited, rase bersalah la plak kan kalo tak turun, so paksa Izzat teman skali. Hehehehe. We went to have a look at the cultural village. It was nice, and it's free!! :)) But then, the rain stopped and we decided to go to the wharf, to ask if it's possible to go to some of the islands. And the answer is YES!! :) Although unexpected, we went to the Manukan island by boat, I LOVE THE RIDE!! We went snorkelling, although, ehem, i have to admit, i have no talent at all in snorkelling. I feel suffocated, and each time I went under water, I had trouble breathing, and I tried to inhale as much air as I could via my nose. and ended up drowning. well, sort of. ;) Then, gave up, waited for the boat, then went back to the hotel. Izzat and abah rushed to the airport (gile kan semalam je diorg pegi KK, izzat siap ponteng skolah lagi!). Had burger king for dinner.

Day 3

Walked to the Filipino Market. Took about 30 min (sebab mak jalan slow kan :P). Time tu gilaaaaaaa!!!! Shopping shopping and shopping!! Pearl brooches, rings, bracelets and watch. Yes i bought all that plus some souvenirs for edy's family. :) Met ijah and family there. Then went back to hotel, lepak2, makan2, solat, then kuar balik. I dont remember exactly where. tapi i think sempat beli baju. :) day full of shopping.

Day 4

Our last day here. Checked out, but we were allowed to put our bags in the store. so mak went to buy keropok, kek lapis and also frozen prawns. had lunch at secret recipe. yes, kitorg tak banyak makan kt local stalls or restaurants takut tak halal and food poisoning (had experience with food poisoning in Kuching). Then went to the airport and bubye Kota Kinabalu! :(((((

Erk, sebab sibuk sangat shopping , takde gambar la day 3 and day 4. :P

of distant memories

Yesterday I failed to sleep after subuh, and so I decided to clean my room up. Well, it was not THAT super messy, it's just that I want to rearrange my things. just a bit. So I threw all my things (book, clothes, accessories etc) on the floor and started cleaning. Tiring!!! But, I found some of the things that reminded me to my childhood. :) Let's have a look.

 When I was in my lower form, I love to bring a file with me. And then, I'll put all the pics of my fave celebrity. Back then, I never seldom miss buying the Lime and Galaxie magazines. So this was what one of my file looked like. I love horror movies, hence the horror pics like ju-on (omg toshio is so cuteeeee). There's this one japanese guy that I adored (forgot his name already). Simple plan? Hurmmm, thats kinda weird because im not a big fan or anything. Eminem!!!! Elijah Wood? Well, because I love his eyes when I watched LOTR. Perghhhh Shah Rukh Khan. I love watching hindi movies since I was in kindergarten lagik. :P Ok next memory pleaseee. :)

Cuba korang teka apekah makhluk asing ini? Nampak macam gross kan? Agak gross la. Tengok tarikh tu, tahun 2000, waktu saya baru je form 1. Yes, I had appendicitis (tak tau la betul ke tak). Teringat time tu memang dasat menahan sakit yang amat, bayangkan dari petang sakit, tengah malam baru pegi hospital and check appendix ke tak. lepas tu kol 7 baru la operate. Time tu nak tau sape yang paling teruk menangis? mesti la si gemuk ida tu. eheheh. So bak kate abah saya, saya ni agak cacat la. cacat dalaman. sebab da takde appendix. :(


Ok tengok ni. Name card sebegini rupa memang sangat fames time saya kecik2 dulu. Bile pakcik posmen hantarkan katalog die kat umah, sembunyi2 lari masuk bilik dan terus pilih design. Hahahahah. Im not sure if my parents still didnt know about this until now. ;)

 Haa, tengok2. Not only me tau. Even my friends loveeeee doing name cards and distributing it to each one of us. Yang ni cik fana pnye. Hehehehe.

 Yang tak boleh menahan bila tengok2, Rahmah pnye name card je da ade 5 daaaa. Ade 4 je kan kat sini? sebenarnya memang ade lima, tapi saya ade dua name card berdesignkan doraemon. Gila fames plak doraemon ni kan? Hahahahhaha. Yes, this is kind of embarrasing, thinking back years later, but well, it was enjoyable and exciting. I do not regret doing this kind of stuff, because if I do not have this kind of sweet memories, then I will not be smiling now. :))))))))))

Finally Done!!

Yes, I'm still not sleeping, I guess I wont be sleeping at all today. :)

And yes, I've changed the heading, adding some pics, and changed the blog address.

And another yes, I'm going to call cik abang, saje nak kacau sebab da takleh nak tido kan. :P

HAPPY 5th RAMADHAN EVERYONE!! 

Menyibuk?

Hmmm, tadi lepas sahur and solat subuh sume da konfiden da nak tido, masuk dalam selimut bagai. Adoiiii tapi sekarang sebab asyik sangat membaca blog si Arianna ni sampai tak leh nak tido da ni. :( Lepas tu dan2 plak kuar chapter manga one piece, naruto and bleach. Mmg tgh high la ni. :P So saje je nk nyibuk kt blog kejap hehehehe.

 Ida plans to bring me and my mum to her graduation in Wrexham. But suddenly, my dad wants to ikut pulak. So my mum said she doesnt want to go - alasan tak larat nak naik flight lama2. I think she would be lying if she says she doesnt want to go to Ida's graduation, I bet she really really wants to go to see her graduates, so I dont mind at all if tak dapat ikut. :) I know when to ask for something and when to give it up to other people who needs it more than me. :)

Okay, I think I should get back to sleep everyone. :)

Reminder

I've said that this blog is actually mine, not me and my cik abang kan? somehow im too lazy to change the heading, the website address. hehehe. but just want to tell you this is OUR MY blog, sometimes ade la kot terselit pasal cik abang. :)

Life before.... :)

Okay, the entry sounds catchy. :P a lot of things happened in my life, and i dont even have time to share it on my blog (even though i am unemployed right now, i wonder why am i so busy then?). so this entry is to catching up on what i have been doing lately. So get ready, this one is going to be long!! :)

22-29 MAY 2011

Woohoo!! I'm back in Sydney!!!! Before this, setiap kali pegi Sydney alone je, this time ade mak and abah. hehehe. Because it's my graduation!!!! :D Well, i think they enjoyed the trip, tapi kesian kat mak sakit kaki sebab banyak jalan. :(

Day 1
Well, we stayed at Malaysia Hall for 3 nights. Most of the time we used public buses because there is no train station near the eastern suburbs. Abah wanted to eat kebab, and we walked quite a distance only to discover that the shop is closed. Duhh. So we went to eat Thai food, it was so-so for me, I dont know why a lot of Malaysians love to go there. Then, we went to Coogee Beach, my favorite place (has always been!!). But since each time I came back from Sydney, people will always ask about Bondi, so this is it peeps! Then of course, tak sah pegi sydney kalau tak naik ferry tengok Opera House and Harbour Bridge. Hehehe, they love it!! but mak tak tahan sejuk, asyik duduk kt dalam je. ;)

Day 2
Okay, second day kitorg naik ferry pegi Manly. Memandangkan da beli weekly bus ticket, kite harus menggunakan sebaik mungkin. Hohohoho. So what we did was we took the bus to Railway Square, walk to the Paddy's, then took a ride to the Fish Market by tram (tram tak tram sangat la :P). Ngeeee, bestttt makan seafood banyak2. Mussels, oysters, squids, prawns, fishes, woohoo!! :) Of course la makan tak abis kalo pegi Fish Market ni. so dengan bekal yang ade, naik tram back to Paddys, then naik bas to Circular Quay, and then naik ferry to Manly! The last time I went there was about 3 years ago, and mann, a lot of things have changed! I like the new look. Pastu bekas Fish Market tu kitorg makan kt situ, tapi benci la burung2 kt situ asyik mengganggu je! :( Balik tu kitorg makan kt kedai Indonesian dekat ngan kedai Silk Road tu. Ala, yang kaler oren tu. ok la, not bad. :)

Day 3

Ngeee. Today we're going to my uni, because I want to collect my graduation robe. Then from there, we went to the Featherdale Wildlife Park by train. Abah was very excited with the train, dua tingkat la katakan. Hehehehehe. The journey took about one hour. Sampai2 je ape lagi, main2 ngan kangaroo laa. Hehehe. There are kangaroos, koalas, wallabies, emus, penguins, dangos, wombats,echidnas and a tasmanian devil. and lots of birds and reptiles and amphibians and mammals and bla bla bla. :P What's exciting is that they have a lot of native species here, and you can actually touch and feed them. :) But look at mak, amik gambar jauh je ngan kangaroo. sebab takut! :P

Day 4
We checked out early, and headed to my ex-house hehehehe. then, i showed my parents my school, faculty, famous buildings of the uni and of course taking lots of pre-graduation photos. My graduation was on Friday, but I can collect the robe on Wednesday and had to return it exactly after my graduation, so I took this opportunity to take as many photos as I can. :) Sebenarnya ade banyak lagi gambar but letak yang ni je, nanti jenuh orang nak tengok. :) And after that we headed to opera house, hehehehe. ade la gambar sket. I LOVE OPERA HOUSE!! Ngee, tak penah bosan kalau pegi seribu kali pon. Magnificent! :)

Day 5 - Hari yang dinanti-nantikan :)



:)))) I'll let the photos do the talking. Because " a picture tells a thousand stories". Ngeee :P


Day 6
Nothing much. Abah wanted to go to the Blue Mountain. I dont think it is worthy to go to the mountain, nothing much to see. for me laa. not worthy enough to spend quite an amount of money. but since we had the weekly ticket, it doesnt hurt to go to the mountain by train. :) what we did is we went to the last station, Lithgow and took a ride back to redfern. well, this is my first time, and I enjoyed the scenery. :) it's a bit tiring for my parents because asyik duduk je. hehehe, when arrived at Lithgow, Abah rushed to buy a cappuccino (share with Mak :P) and a hot choc for me. :) Sampai umah, solat sume then malam kuar makan kt kedai Ughur near Darling Harbour, blanja my ex-housemates. :)

Day 7 - Last day


We're rushing to the kebab shop sebab adik bongsu saya teringin kebab and pide, couldnt get the pide sebab kedai bukak lambat, and we're running out of time, so beli kebab je but dua okayyy. :) Then went to the airport, ade kedai kebab halal dalam tu, mak kesiankan adik, so beli la pide. :) hehehehe. pelik sebab mane ade orang balik dari oz pesan pide or kebab (bak kate hakim, dia panggil pide p-diddy). LOL. So off we went to our beloved home country. :)

That's all for my Sydney trip. :) Do you guys remember that I sort of promised to upload my big bro's wedding? Huhuhu Im so sorry but I dont think I will do it, dah takde mood. :( But I have some pics to upload for my trip to KK. Next entry insyaAllah. :)